Over the last few weeks I’ve had this steadily growing insomnia. For some crazy reason my brain tells my body that it isn’t done for the day. I then do about four things almost simultaneous: I read; watch TV (or a movie); I write; and I play video games on either my phone or ipad – you should see me when I try all four…crazy… yeah… crazy.
I have a few ideas of why I am this way… one: in college I stayed up hours on end… two: I don’t like falling asleep… three: I’m afraid to forget something important.
resting for me is easy…sleep is hard.
Rest is a period where I can briefly close my eye and brain and charge up for the rest of the day. Sleep is when I’m vulnerable…
I wish that I could describe it better for you… I wish you could know the burden of a person who burns the candle into the wee hours.
I want to rest… I want to sleep…
I think there is something here to talk about.
Sometimes I agree, we need those moments – especially during the day to day – of rest. We need our minds to shut down briefly so we can be a better person. Sometimes we need to take a breath before we speak. Sometimes we need to shut down anger and frustration so we can be more clear.
And yes, some times we need that utter vulnerableness. We need to feel like a new born baby, completely dependent on someone to care for us. We need to be open up to all possibilities of the dark night, and the hopes of a bright tomorrow.
I want to encourage you; if you are like me and have sleepless nights, to look out for the sun and the fortune it holds. All of the possibilities are open to those who are willing to grab for them.
